24 hours and 1 minute
by mirsch
Summary: Hallie and Matt made a deal, which they never got to live up to. Please let me know what you think. Your reviews are highly appreciated :)
1. Chapter 1

It was a quiet morning in Chicago. It was only 6:45 's alarm had just gone off, telling him to get ready for his 24 hour shift. He lay in for a couple of minutes with Hallie in his arms. He must have fallen back to sleep, because when he woke up, Hallie. He looked at his alarm clock 6:59 am. He pulled Hallie back in bed for another couple of minutes, knowing he really ought to get ready for work.

'In 24 hours and 1 minute, I want to be right back here' she had said. 'Deal' Matt had whispered looking up into her beautiful eyes, sealing their deal with a soft kiss, before having to leave their comfortable spot in bed.

She had dropped him off at the station before going to the clinic. They gave each other a quick kiss before he went in, he couldn't stop himself from turning around to get another kiss. After that he went into the house. Matt must have had a big smile on his face, since Hermann came up to him telling him he was really happy for him. He was really happy, he couldn't deny that.

He spent the day imagining what they would do after the 24 hours and 1 minute were up. He would cook her breakfast in bed. Wake her up with a kiss, eat together, take a shower together, watch a movie, maybe go for a run. Basically he wanted them to waste the day, as long as they did it together anything would be fine.

He hadn't imagined himself in the waiting room area of the hospital, pacing and waiting for news on Hallie's situation. He carefully avoided the gazes of his coworkers. Even though he could feel their gazes burning on his back. They were worried and probably rightfully so. Matt was scared out of his mind, but tried his best to keep his brave face on.

The last time he saw her she didn't draw a single breath, not even when he was desperately telling her to, her heart wasn't beating, she didn't open her eyes. There had been no sign of life. Matt sniffled and blinked his tears away as he kept pacing. He tried to breathe calmly, without anyone noticing he was trying really hard and quite frankly failing.

He tried to convince himself that the doctors wouldn't take this long if it was hopeless. There must have been a sign of life or they would have been back by now to tell him that... he shook his head, he couldn't think like that. She was going to be okay. Her eyes would open, the burns on her face would heal nicely, he would hold her again. He needed her to come back to him. She had been a light after what seemed a lifetime of darkness, when they met at 22. After everything they had been through in the last year, losing Andy, having trouble in their relationship, Voight harassing them, they deserved a break. He needed a break, good news for once.

Hallie had given him a safe place to land after his own family had fallen apart. When he told girls about his family drama, they would usually walk away from him, before he had even finished the story. Hallie had just held his hand while he told her everything. She had hugged him and told him it didn't change anything. She was home to him.

From time to time the image of Hallie just lying there trapped between the flames assaulted his mind, so he kept pacing. Eventually the doctor came in. 'Mr. Casey,' the doctor started when Matt came into his line of sight. Matt noticed a weary look on the doctor's face and his heart sank a little. 'We did everything we could...' Matt tried to swallow the painful lump in his throat. This couldn't be happening. 'Hallie passed away after...' Matt didn't hear the rest of the doctor's story.

He felt like he had been punched in the stomach and held his arm over it. He looked around hoping to find a spot where he could hide. His other hand went over his mouth as He staggered back towards the wall and let himself slide along the wall until he was in a sitting position. He pulled his knees towards his chest and let his head hang between them. He put his hands over his head and the tears that had been threatening to fall since had arrived at the hospital, finally fell.

He didn't just cry for Hallie, he cried for Andy, for his mom, for the Voight situation, for his fight with Severide, hell he even cried for his dad, even though it had been 15 years. He felt conflicted, he wanted to be held, to be comforted, but also didn't want anyone to see him like this. So he sat on the floor sobbing on his own, making himself as small as he could, crying as quietly as he could manage.

He felt a hand on his back as he sobbed. Someone pulled him quite forcefully out of his curled up position and pulled Matt against them. Matt struggled a little against the strong arms pulling at him. 'Come on, buddy' a familiar voice said and Matt relaxed into his grip, letting himself be comforted. 'I'm so sorry, Matt' Severide whispered as Matt's sobs grew louder.

At some point the tears had stopped and Matt felt panic rising. He didn't know what to do without Hallie. She was the wiser one, the one that gave him guidance when he needed it most. Now that she was gone he didn't know what to do.

He hadn't noticed how much his breathing had quickened until he was having a full blown panic attack. He felt a needle being pushed into his arm. Suddenly the world slowed down his breathing evened out and Matt just stared into the distance. He felt nothing, he was just really tired.

'Lieutenant Casey' finally cut through his haze 'Yes, Chief' Casey responded automatically to the calm and commanding voice. 'It's time to go now' Boden said. Casey recognised the order and instinctively did as he was told. He felt a hand on his arm and heard a whispered 'come on, buddy'. He stood up out of the seat he didn't remember getting into.

A couple of minutes later he was sat down in the front seat of a car. It was warm and comfortable in the car and he was nodding off quickly, to be rudely awakened by the images dancing on the inside of his eyelids.

He woke up to a mixture of smells. He smelled freshly made coffee, mixed with smoke and old sweat.

When he opened his eyes he found that he was home, which was weird, because he was supposed to be on shift. The fact that he had fallen asleep on the couch didn't really compute either. He still had his work clothes on, which smelled like he had been fighting a fire. What the hell happened?

Matt felt he hadn't slept all that well, he had a weird dream, or a nightmare rather.

He heard someone puttering about in his kitchen. 'Hallie?' Matt called out, hoping for a cuddle to steer off the eerie feeling the nightmare left with him. 'Hey bud' Severide answered, which threw Matt off even more.

'Sev..., what are you doing here?' Matt asked as he sat up on the couch. Severide gave him a pitiful look. 'Hey Matt, you slept all right?' he asked his voice laced with concern. 'Nightmare. You didn't answer my question, though' Matt said agitated as he fumbled for his phone. 'Where's Hallie?' He had tons of massages asking him if he was alright, that they wanted to help if he needed anything. Then he saw the time.

7:01 am

'Sev?' Matt asked Severide when realisation hit that it hadn't been a nightmare. Severide knelt in front of him looking him straight in the eye.

'Hallie died last night, Matt'.


	2. Chapter 2

That night he sat in his car, quietly watching the front door of Hallie's parents' house. He squeezed the steering wheel tightly, trying to scrunch up the courage to go in and talk to them. He had seen Viv's car as well. Matt had forgotten that there would be a family dinner that night. He and Hallie had been invited, but Hallie was supposed to be working that night, so their absence didn't stir any concern, with the happy little family. The happiness he was about the blast into a million pieces.

Matt took a deep breath, got out of his car and walked briskly towards the front door. Before he knocked he took a deep breath again and rehearsed in his mind what he was going to say. He knocked and heard someone coming to the door.

'Hi, sweetheart. I thought you and Hallie weren't coming' Hallie's mom said looking somewhat confused at him. She looked around to see if she saw Hallie somewhere, which really pulled at Matt's heart strings. 'Hi Alice, Uhm no we weren't. Can I come in? I have to tell you something' Matt said, completely forgotten what he had just rehearsed.

Alice set a step aside so Matt could enter her house. Matt saw the worried look in her eyes, but she didn't say anything about it. She just squeezed his upper arm, letting him know she saw something was bothering him. Matt and Alice had always really liked one another, she was always being a bit of a mother hen when it came to Matt. Even more so than with Viv's husband Tim.

He was greeted jovially by Hallie's dad Gary, her sister Viv, Tim and the kids, their confusion obvious on their faces. Dinner had just been served and the room smelled like pork chops, mashed potatoes and brussel sprouts, Hallie's favorite. Matt swallowed. 'Maybe we should sit down, I uhm... I have to tell you something' Matt said trying his best to keep his voice from trembling. Concern etched on their faces. Viv sent the kids out of the room.

As they were all sat down on the couches in the living room, Matt took a deep breath and started to tell the story. 'There was a fire in the clinic where Hallie worked last night' Matt started taking a deep breath to steady himself, while carefully avoiding their gazes by looking at his fiddling hands. 'She was unconscious, she was trapped in a medicine cage, when I found her. My colleague and I pulled her out' he inhaled sharply, feeling a tear slip along his cheek. 'She wasn't breathing, so we rushed her to the hospital...' he couldn't keep his tears at bay anymore and he felt them steadily rolling down his face. 'The doctors tried, but she passed away' Matt ended his story holding his head in his hands and crying. 'I'm so sorry, I tried, I really did' Matt sobbed as the family slowly took in the information he had just given them.

He had talked to loved ones of victims before, he had been trained to do it, but those victims, those loved ones, they were strangers. He couldn't remember his training right now, even if his life had depended on it. Saying the words hurt like hell and knowing Hallie's family would feel as devastated as he did, made it a thousand times worse.

'Oh my god' he heard Viv whisper, while Tim took her into his arms in a feeble attempt of comforting her. Gary just stormed out of the room a couple of seconds later Matt heard him scream and yell in agony in the family's garage. Alice just sat next to Matt in silence, watching him cry.

He felt guilty about not being able to save her daughter, a woman he loved more than his own life. He felt guilty because Alice and Gary had taken him into their family, even after finding out about his own family. And he couldn't save their daughter, after all they did for him.

'Tim, can you go check on Gary, please?' She asked her other son-in-law. Tim nodded and walked towards the garage, where it sounded like someone was thrashing the house. Viv was hugging a pillow and crying her eyes out. Alice put an arm around Matt's shaking frame. 'Matt, look at me' she ordered him and Matt braced himself to meet her probably angry gaze.

'Matt' she said again after he didn't respond. 'I tried, I really did. I... I' he wanted to tell her everything he did, but he knew it would never be enough. So he looked at her. Despair in his eyes hoping for any kind of forgiveness.

'Oh Matt...' she said as she pulled him in for a hug 'I know you did everything you could and probably even more' she sighed as she comforted him.

Matt cried on her shoulder as she cried on his.


End file.
